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Witches' Brew: Are You A Name Profiler?

Friday, February 19, 2010

Are You A Name Profiler?

So I'm in Whole Foods about to drop major coin on some organic porterhouse steaks when I happen to glance at my cashier's nametag. It read, "Quanesha"....... I ever so gentlly removed my items from the belt and went to find a cashier with a more suitable name. I am ashamed of my behavior but I do this often. Nametags, although a seemingly grand idea as it relates to customer service is sometimes not a good idea at all, especially to weirdos like me who do not think it's possible to get good customer service from someone named Quanesha, Dayquillnesha, Sondranesha, or Marquesha........ No disrespect to the "sha's" out there. I'm sure you're all very nice people.... just sayin is all.

Quanesha was probably a very capable cashier so I know running outta her line was unreasonable but something about names that end in "sha" just doesn't sit right with me. I know it's an awful thing to admit, but I am indeed a "Name Profiler", I can't help it.

So, I did go to "Rob's" line... see, Rob, a simple, non threatening all American name that you don't have to perform tongue tricks to pronounce. Something tells me my steaks will taste better cause "Rob" rang me up and plus I want my ass kissed a little at check-out, I mean after all I'm spending on these naturally raised steaks it's only right and Quanesha over there is simply not gonna spit shine my ass the way Rob will........

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4 Comments:

At Friday, February 19, 2010 at 3:49:00 PM EST , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whoever wrote this article is an a**whole. You weren't having brain surgery (although maybe you should consider it), it was a simple checkout line. If your small-minded ass chose to re-act in that way, that's your loss! P.s. I have an non-threatening "all-american" name!

 
At Friday, February 19, 2010 at 9:27:00 PM EST , Blogger Phlip said...

Guilty as sin!
I am a notorious name profiler, keep in mind that I made a post about it a while back.

 
At Saturday, February 20, 2010 at 1:20:00 PM EST , Anonymous L.P. said...

If I did that, I'd end up trapped in the supermarket.

 
At Saturday, February 20, 2010 at 6:54:00 PM EST , Blogger Reggie said...

You're wrong for that.


By the way, how were the steaks?!?

 

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