Celebrity Love Letter: Pharell

I've stood by a lot with you man. You sexy lil mofo. I have BEEN THERE FOR YOU!
I loveded you mostly thru the skateboardin' and ass-shakin' beats, nothing like a cutie on a half pike to get this cougar all nostalgic like.

I turned a closed eye to the experimenting you were doing with that little fancy fellow from Chicago. But you know hey- I'm willing to let a man be a well manicured man who hangs out while matching with another well manicured man. I'm giving like that.

And like an understanding woman, I said 'wow, great I idea, baby!' as you decided to laser off layers of arm meat to get rid of those sleeves of inkage.

But there is where I draw the line, Bucko! I cannot let you stand there looking like a sawed off Paddington Bear, playing dress up in your daddy's boots! Where the hell are your legs, maing?!

GET IT TOGETHER THELONIOUS P!