Things Negroes Like: Baby Name Edition

We Negroes sure are an innovative bunch. We sell commemorative t-shirts the moment something happens. We use the trunks of our cars as stores to sell our hot new CDs we've been working on. Nevermind that dude is 45 and still trying to get that big break in hip-hop.

One of the wonders that never ceases to amaze me is the joy we Negroes delight in when we name our embryos. Oh yes, you've met the kid with the phonetically-spelled name whose teacher just calls them by the last name. The baby named after the alcohol-of-the-moment who probably will never be taken seriously on the job… if she ever gets a job. We name the babies after cars, celebrities, Italian mafia families and anything else you'll never find on a keychain at Disneyworld.

I'm sure you know a few of these:

• Alize
• Lexus (do you own a car?)
• Mercedes (ditto)
• BonQuisha
• La Shawnte
• La Quitta
• Hennessey
• KelShanique
• MayOnnaise (suddenly, I'm hungry)
• Traonna
• And my personal fave: Lenomjelo
• Check out Bell of the South for an even more hysterical list

So, what's the craziest ghetto name you've ever heard? Jump to the comments section and spill it! And if your name is Nuvo...please don't be offended but go talk to your Momma!