Reason #4566 to beat your kids!

While other 4-year-old were dreaming of sugar canes and lollipops, one Tennessee tyke was out doing BIG THANGS! During family sleepy times, he somehow got past the child proof locks, found his Pap Pap's beer cooler in the back yard, and after throwing back half a can of Bud Light (less calories) he stumbled to a neighbors house, broke in, and stole five Christmas gifts, including a brown dress which he promptly put on (then vogued around the living room). Police found the cross-dressing drunk 4-year-old and took his bad ass back to his mamma who told a reporter (after she got all fancy-like for the camera) the little boy wants to go to jail "'cuz that's where his daddy is". Um, eh, yeah...I've got nothin!