Brew Bits: Japan Celebrates Your Junk Down Below

I promise you, we don’t make this stuff up.

Springtime in Japan must mean “celebrate the peen and the poon!” The country has held festivals in honor of the penis and the vagina for 1,500 years. The celebrations ensure a good harvest and, well, they also promote baby-making. I prefer to promote baby-making with wine, a steak and a nice Luther/Teddy/Maxwell mixtape, but whatever floats your boat.

During the festivals, kids carry a small vagina to a shrine and then the grown men carry a very large vadge to the shrine along a parade route.

Naturally, the penis fest draws a bigger crowd. I mean, I like my hoo-hah and all but I’d sorta rather look at the ding, if ya know what I mean. Anyway, the penis fest brings in 100,000 “fans” who pose with candy penises and then parade a 6 ft. long wooden penis down the street.

 

Looks like my kinda party. So, who’s down to go to Japan with me?

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