Skype Speed Dating

It's really hard out here for a pimp.  You can't meet any fresh meat on the job (that's not a good look and could get messy).  And the pickings are slim at the club, the coffee house and church.  Or you could try speed dating and wind up packed along the wall with the 50 other Black women fighting for 5 minutes with the 15 brothas who've shown up.

So, WHERE do you go to meet men?  Right here.  Right in front of your computer screen.  Skype has a service called Skyecandy.  It's a speed- dating service that matches you with real people via Skype and your webcam.  It's just like a normal Skype call... only you're searching for love and not a conference call.

Once on the call, you chat in 5-minute intervals.  When time is up, click YES or NO to indicate if you're interested in chatting or if you're dunzo with that dude.  If both Skypers say they want to keep the chat going, then you can do that (for free) over Skype.

A sista might have to try this out.  I ain't getting no younger.

Escape My Date

Have you ever been trapped on a painful date?  I sure have.  Let's see... there was that one time a dude told me about his impending WEDDING while we were having appetizers.  Well, ladies, fear those scrubs no more!  Now, there's Escape My Date.

The site uses Twitter to reach out to your friends and rescue you from dating hell.  To make use of the site, sign up with your Twitter info, create a profile and then pick the friends you'd want to reach out to you to escape a bad date.  When that bad date rolls around, send a direct message @EscapeMyDate and they will send the message to your selected friends. If your friends don't call you within five minutes, Escape My Date will automatically call you to give you an out.

Of course, you could just tell that dude he sucks and then quit that bitch in glorious Bianca fashion!

Who Needs a Woman... When You Can Make One?

I'm no fan of the lackluster "dating scene" these days either, but dayum. I have no plans to "create" a man (well, not counting the one with batteries in the cabinet).

This Japanese man has spent more than $170,000 on rubbery sex dolls! He has one for every day of the week. Hell, one for every day of the month.

He says he's over the dating game and would rather make sweet love to his silent dolls than find a real woman.

So, is he nuts or does he have a point? Are women too much trouble? Did I miss that memo? What's your call?

Is Dating Dead?

Remember when boys used to pinch and elbow you in class to show they liked you? That led to them making you check 'yes' or 'no' to profess your love (or, your dislike) for them. If you played your cards right, the next step was something my aunties always referred to as courting. That's some ancient process where the guy rolls out the red carpet for your affection.

I think the art of courting died somewhere circa 1950-ish. These days, you're lucky if you get a Can I come over? text, or a What you doin' tonight? e-mail. And don't hold your breath for him providing you with a meal because he's coming over to your house to eat the food you bought and cooked in your kitchen.

So I ask, what happened to dating? Does anyone go on actual Would you like to go to dinner with me on Friday at 8 at Chez Whitey? dates anymore? Is dating dead or are men just cheap? Or, maybe women are giving the goods away without the need for the dates? Perhaps since courting died, no one really knows HOW to date anymore.

Not to toot my own stuff, but I think I'm well-worthy of being asked out, putting on some nice duds, being driven in your car (on your gas dime) and taken some place decent (it doesn't have to be Le Cirque but it can't be In & Out burger either) for a meal that comes with no strings attached. Unless, of course, a sista wants some after-dinner strings... hey, we all have needs & I don't judge.

In return for these dates, I will provide you with my undivided attention, my witty banter, my blinging smile (no, I don't have diamonds in my teeth) and, perhaps, some of the good softlip when the date is over (the lips on my FACE... get your mind out of the gutter!).

Now, you don't have to take me out three times a week (I do have other things going on). And I'm well aware there's a recession going on. But it would be nice to get a weekly offer to do SOMETHING (dinner, movie, ice skating, concert, museum trip, walk in the park, go karting, kumbaya-singing... something that brings us closer together)! These are all things we women ultimately wind up doing with our girlfriends. Some of my best 'dates' have been with my crew. Damn shame my girls love me better than any man ever has.

Women shouldn't have to beg for a man's time and likewise, we shouldn't have to plan everything either. It wouldn't kill you to shave, put on some real pants and take us out. Man up and take charge... we like that, no matter how independent we are or may seem.

I'm tired of dating myself, dammit!!!