Brew Tube: Caulk In Your Rear?

Some people will do anything for a bigger donk.

Six New Jersey women had to be hospitalized after receiving butt injections that contained the kind of silicone used to caulk bathtubs. The women went to hotels and had unlicensed providers perform the booty enhancements.

How about just getting a pair of these and calling it a day?

Brew Health: Get Your Booty Right

Leave it to a “video vixen” to teach us how to get our rears in order. Buffie “The Body” Carruth is releasing something called a “Booty-Nomics.” So far, her booty workouts are just on YouTube with official videos “coming soon” (you know, that’s Negro lingo for “til I pay for distribution”… or “under construction” or whatever).

Taste The Brew to see the vids.
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Tell ‘Em Son

Ne-Yo is the next Billy Blanks! Somebody get this man some Richard Simmons shorts, STAT! He’s like, the Great Motivator or some shizz.

Ne-Yo told a "budding singer" to get her hip and thigh game tight before she tries to ink a record deal. Then, he proceeds to out Beyonce as a member of Team Klump (like we didn't know that already). Hercules! Hercules!



So, does Ne-Yo really have that much time to kill that he can listen to a chick sing her whole demo tape? I thought this was the Year of the Gentleman. Shouldn’t he be somewhere promoting that?

Anyway, it’s an ugly business, girl, but props to Mr. Yo for keeping it real and taking time to listen to you croon about battered men (uh, WTF?).

Dear Serena…

Dear Serena,

I'm a little jealous of your ass. I mean, your donk doesn’t haunt me or give me night terrors, but when I see it, I do get a little misty at what could have been had my DNA been arranged differently.

Now, I’m no hater. I applaud anyone who can pull off a bathing suit, much less a bikini without running to toss on a sarong or a muumuu. If you got it, flaunt that shizz.

But, Serena…girl, with all the money you have, why don’t you ever wear a bikini that fits? If when you put the bikini bottom on it covers your ass, but when you step out of the water, you’re now wearing a thong instead…then the thing doesn’t fit correctly.

Please see a stylist immediately and come to terms with the reality that maybe you should go up a size.

Denial is a powerful thing.

Signed,
Only slightly jealous of your booty

Excessive Butt Meat???? Try these...

Jeans, they are fashion staple for many women, but when your bottom half has a troubling circumference, finding that killa pair of jeans can be a nightmare. Since we keep things asstastical here at the Brew and as an official member of the Big Booty Judy club, it's only right that we discuss jeans that flatter us girls that have extra meat in the gluteus. Enter PZI jeans. Most of us big booty girls all share the same problem, the jeans fit great everywhere but the waist area, but not with PZI jeans. There will be no more gappage in the waist area with these jeans. They fit seamlessly over wide hips, thick thighs and extreme butt meat. If you try em you will love em. They look sexy and for me I like how they contain all my butt meat neatly with style and flair.

See reviews from fellow thickies...

Ample Booty Anguish?

IS YOUR AMPLE BOOTY KEEPING YOU UNHEALTHY??????

This question is addressed to me as well. You see one of the things I find troubling in the African American community is the myth that having extra blessings in the rump area somehow excuses you from getting your health in order. I mean let's face it, most of our men (most, not all) love extra poundage in the booty area and because many of us base our self worth on the feedback we receive from the opposite sex we oftentimes think it's all good to remain overweight cause we fill out a pair of jeans nicely. Now this certainly applies to me. Getting my health on track is no new journey for me, I've been exercising on and off for many years and to be honest I would probably be at my goal weight had I not consistently let others get in my head "girl you look great" "yeah but you carry that extra weight so well" "you are just super curvy", I could go on and on but my point is I constantly gave up on myself because people, men to be specific insisted that what I had going on was the stuff black men's dreams are made of. Now don't get me wrong, I am totally sexy and I am quite fond of my figure but the truth of the matter is that there needs to be a lot less of it if I have any plans on maintaining extended health and vitality as I approach 40 years old in 2 more years.

We live in a world that gets caught up in the hype on a regular basis. The same holds true when it comes to taking charge of our health and our bodies. No one else can tell you what's good for you but you and men drooling at your ample hind parts does not excuse the extra pounds you are carrying around. Don't believe the hype that losing weight will cause you to lose your assets, no way, no how. I have been thinner than I am currently and trust me my milkshake still had boys coming to the yard.

It's nice to be curvy and to celebrate those curves but it's also nice to wake up with energy, to have joints that don't ache, to have control over your body and how you nourish it. You don't have to subscribe to a life of eating trees and berries, just change a little something everyday and move as much as you can. That's all. I'm down 14lbs since June (WHOOO HOOOOO!!!!). Could have been more but as I said, I fell into the "girl your body is hot" hype and lost my focus. Won't happen again.

BOOTYLICIOUS SISTAS UNITE AND GET YOUR WEIGHT RIGHT!