STOP LOSS MY ASS!

File this one under f*cked up! Officials with Multi-National Corp Iraq have a U.S. soldier in custody after he went on a rampage and killed five fellow officers. The shooting happened at Camp Liberty in Baghdad Monday. The soldier was reportedly being treated for "stress" when the shooting occurred. WTF?! Why are we over there again? Discuss....

WB's Cornball Corner: Kobe Bryant

I admit when Kobe Bryant first burst on the scene I was smitten. He's tall, handsome and could speak Italian. What more is there? Over the years though my love for the Kobe has waned, considerably. It started when dissed his father and married that crazy weffa Vanessa when she was still in high school, then it was the rape charge, then he ratted out his teammates about their jumpoff activities breaking the "Bros before Hoes" code! Classic bitchassness if you ask me. Now, he's messing with Spike Lee and I don't like it. Spike directed the film, "Kobe: Doin' Work". Lee had worked for months to get permission from Bryant, the Lakers and Coach Phil Jackson. It was supposed to be a day-in-the-life of that tall bama. So what does Bryant do at the last minute. He suddenly said he would not cooperate unless he was granted creative control! Spike Lee tried to contact Kobe on the phone to work things out but Kobe's ass wouldn't take his calls. The award-winning director even drove to Kobe's exclusive gated community, but couldn't get in! WTF? Kobe you should be happy someone wants to do a program on your ass! I guess they worked things out. Page Six is reporting the Lee "completely yielded" to the big baby's wishes. The flick was screened last weekend at the Tribeca Film Festival. Bryant is known to be a control freak when it comes to his image. I get all that but come on Kob, it's like that? Really? For that you are the cornball of the week, weak, weak! Now, like Shaquille O'Neal said, "tell me how my ass tastes..."

Oprah Is Not Unbeweavable

On Friday's show, Oprah Winfrey busted a myth that has been keeping me up at night: is her hair a weave or not?

Oprah says all that hurr is actually hers.  She gets it pressed out everyday and felt the need to show us a "before" photo to prove it.  Uh, I dunno Op... I coulda sworn I've seen you scratch your head and the whole back of your "wig" moved!  We don't believe you, you need more people.

Oh and she also says she does her own Twitter updates.

Click here to watch the video and judge for yourself.

Fantasia Keeps It Real

Break out the TiVo and the Hooked on Phonics cuz Fantasia Barrino is heading to a TV near you.
American Idol winner Fantasia (or, "Plantation" as my peeps like to call her) is getting her own reality TV show on VH1.

The show is slated to jump off in 2010...so you've got time to brush up on your Ebonics. VH1 execs say Tasia has a compelling personal story and they hope to show "her challenges from fame and her unwillingness to fail."

I just wanna see if Young Dro makes an appearance!

WB'S Cornball Corner: C-Mili and The Dream

It's Monday peeps. Time for WB's Cornball Corner. Today's edition is dedicated to the couple who has the paparazzi on speed dial, Christina Milian and The Dream. They popped up in Maui over the weekend and took the time for a photo-op using the blue seas, white sands, and big ass cubic zirconia ring as a backdrop. Now, I'm not a hater (that much) so I will say they they look kinda cute together. I just can't put a validity stamp on this union yet. Plus, whenever I see The Dream I see his ex-wife Nivea and then I see her boo, Lil Wayne and then I throw up in my mouth a little bit. Some people just don't look kosher. Nivea has that drunk, stank va-jay-jay look. But I digress. Soooooo, C-Milli, good luck, I guess. Make sure he straps it up extra tight! P.S. Can I get your ex-boo Dre's number? He was a cutie.

Celebrity Letter: Kim Kardashian

Dear Fake Cakes, I'm going to write off these five minutes of my life that I'll never get back to ask you what it is that you really do? I don't get it. Your claim to fame is a sex tape with the corniest of cornballs, Ray-J. You know you were in on the scheme to leak it. Then you act shocked when it's released but profit from it. You don't stop there, you take your newly found freak fame and sprinkle some Becky Voodoo Dust all over Reggie Bush which made him revoke his brotherhood membership to become a deputy in the swirl mafia. So now I'm supposed to watch you and your family do whatever it is they do on television? That's a form of torture. Fuck waterboarding, turn that crap program on at Guantanamo Bay and all the terrorists will be singing like a bird by the first commercial! I have some suggestions: tell your mom to act like one, whisper in your step daddy's ear that he needs to lay off the plastic procedures, and then take your sister and her big ass chin and fade to black, stat!

Political Commentary: "What had happened was..."

I'm reaching back to the 80s for this phrase, "gag me with a spoon"! Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele has apologized to conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh for his comments regarding Limbaugh's sweaty tirade at the final of the The Conservative Political Action Conference last week.
"We had a nice conversation last night," Steele said in a statement sent to CNN. "We are all good." That wasn't the case when Steele appeared on "D.L. Hughley Breaks the News". Steele called the windbag's speech "incendiary" and "ugly". Steele also insisted that he is in charge of the GOP, not Limbaugh as some may think.
The next day, Limbaugh went off on Steele during his daily show which caused this Uncle Tom to go quivering back to massa. Steele told the online journal Politico that he "was maybe a little bit inarticulate." Steele went further with his boot lickin', "There was no attempt on my part to diminish his voice or his leadership," adding, "There are those out there who want to look at what he's saying as incendiary and divisive and ugly. That's what I was trying to say. It didn't come out that way." In the words of Rihanna, "eh, eh, eh, eh..."
Riddle me this Batman: why does every Republic bow at the feet of this weighty windbag? Steele for a time served as the Lieutenant Governor of my state of Maryland so I have been following him for a while. I initially appreciated that he stood firm in his convictions, even though they differed from a majority of our state. So why fold like a flimsy set of cards on your first fight? That got me thinking. I have to admit that I was a little perplexed and skeptical when he got the top seat the RNC following Barack Obama's historic election. Was this RNC's attempt to reach across the racial aisle to show the world that its not the inclusive party that it's known to be? Or, was their move some "strategery" aimed at putting a black political figure against another black political figure? Who knows the RNC's motives, but I can tell you that Michael Steele's flip-flop steeze, is not the business. If he can't even stand up to Rush how is he going to represent on the "playground"? Mr. Steele can you dig in closet, find your "brother box", blow the dust off, reach in and pull out some big brown ones please? It's obvious you have lost yours!

WB's Cornball Corner

It's Monday which means it's time for the WB's Cornball Corner.
Today's post is dedicated to the token black dude on "Saturday Night Live", Kenan Thompson. A reporter for US Magazine recently asked this poor-man's Tracy Morgan what he thought of the Chris Brown-Rihanna fiasco. Kenan said Chris Breezy and Ri Ri were welcomed on SNL anytime adding, "We don't care about scandal. We just care about what brings us ratings! If we had them both on the show, that would be crazy." But wait, there's more Stephin Fetchitness to come. Kenan, who is one "good burger" away from Ruben Studdard steeze added, "I know how women can get when you get a text message from another female...." Um, okay? Good luck with SNL stint, R. Belly, I can't see it lasting too much longer! Like Billy in Purple Rain told Prince when he started going all creative and short-bus on the crowd, "Let me give you some good advice, junior; Nobody digs your music but yourself." Note to Kenan, you're not that funny in the first place! You're helping SNL fill its required black guy quota. It's not that serious boo!