Protect Your Penis Texasesss

A new iPhone app has your future political career in mind.  It's called "Safe Sexting" and it allows you to send pics of your nether regions and other bits, but covers up the nasty parts... so those pics don't come back to haunt you when you're....sayyyyyy, about to star in a Disney movie or run for mayor of Detroit or sumthin'.

Apparently the folks at Apple think sexting is so serious that they needed to approve this app. Actually, some 30% of 17 year olds say they've received a sext (nasty asses). 15% of all teenagers have gotten a sex text.

So, here's how Safe Sexting works...

1. Download the app.
2. Open the app and you'll see 4 options to censor your pic.
3. Select from the Small Box, Large Box, Head Box and a semi-transparent Red Silk. 

4.     Take picture.

5.     Send the picture.

Easy enough, right?

And if all else fails, there's actually a friggin' sexting PSA to help you clueless kids out.

But, seriously, if you can't see the peen, what's the point? You've already been imagining what the thing looks like anyway.

Block Kids From Texting While Driving

A new service allows parents to put the brakes on their kids' texting while driving habit. It's called TXTBlocker and it allows parents (and employers) to disable texting functions, block numbers and permit calls that are on a preset safe list.

To set it up, go to the TXTBlocker site, log on and choose the settings to block the phone. It's supposed to work automatically, so users don't have to remember to turn it on and off. It's not clear if the phone detects when you're going at higher speeds though. Otherwise, how would it know when you're behind the wheel? Will it crap out if you're on a bus? The jury's out on that.

The service costs $9.99/month plus a one-time activation fee of $24.99.

Sounds like some big brother isht to me. But whatever keeps the kid safe, I guess?

Tech Talk: Text With Your Voice

States are cracking down on cell phone use while driving. In Maryland, texting while driving becomes illegal tomorrow. If your lifestyle is too fast-paced to simply focus on driving while you drive, then check out Vlingo.

Vlingo is a voice-activated service that allows mobile users to press a button and simply talk their text messages, Google searches and even Facebook status updates. It works really well and, over time, the system even learns your voice. Vlingo works on Windows Mobile phones, iPhones, Blackberries and Nokia phones. Basic use is free but if you want to upgrade to sending texts and e-mail, you will have to pay for the app. It beats getting bailed out or getting a ticket though!



If paying for an app isn't your thing, then check out DriveSafe.ly. It's a free app that reads your emails and texts in real time.

Or you could just put your hands on the wheel and actually drive!

Kanye And The Tush?

Word on the curb is Kanye West may be at the center of the Reggie Bush/Kim Kardashian break up. We told you Monday the couple were on the rocks because of hectic work schedules that kept them apart. Well now it seems a certain Chi-town rapper may have played a bigger role. Reggie reportedly saw texases in Kim's phone from a certain Mr. West and he went all apeshit. The texts referred to a night Kanye & Kim hung out and how hot Kim is. Word is the texts got racier and Reggie went o-f-f.

So, Kanye, does this mean you're done with Amber? We love her around these parts (in a totally non-sexual, non-lesbionic way, I mean). Oh, and we'd take Reggie too!

I'm just sayin'…

Texting While Stupid.....

Text Message: "Let 's just get some food and f*ck all day"

*sigh* hmmm

Me: "who is this?"

ok..... so you see where we are here? Homie's # is not even locked in and yet he's proposing a day "cock" fulla passionate love making and throwing in a burger (ya know, to make the offer something I just can't refuse). Let's all take a pause here. Now this may very well be an appealing offer to many, especially the burger part, but is there any harm in actually calling??? Texting is getting outta hand, it has now become a tool of the weak and incompetent and is now being used to solicit poon-tang. ENOUGH!!!

If you can't talk to me and politely ask for the use of my precious jewel then don't text me! texting is supposed to be for those times when talking is simply not convenient, like when you're in the middle of getting a lap dance or something of that nature. You should not be texting while sitting on your couch watching "the Golden Girls". This is what leads to "texting while stupid" and gets you dumped in the lame box.

Memba what happened to this text messaging super hero????



"Texting While Stupid" is not punishable by law however it can get you fired from your job as Mayor and put in jail. Use Kwame Kilpatdumbass as a cautionary tale. Text responsibly and remember it WILL NOT get you layed. Jerk!