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Witches' Brew: January 2010

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Live Blogging The 2010 Grammy Awards

It's time for music's elite to praise each other with little golden trophies, side eyes and Kanye shrugs. What's the point in watching the Grammys alone, when you could watch with us Brewchies? We'll decode the acceptance speeches ("I wanna thank God and all my fans" really means "The Illuminati made this possible"), critique what people are wearing and translate for Lil Wayne.

Get your 3-D glasses and some Jesus Juice... it's time.

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Brew Quotes: Jay-Z

Read and discuss...
"I’d like to be a dad some day and I love children. You start your life with expectations and dreams, then life unfolds and it doesn’t always turn out the way you imagined. Life is what it is. And at this point it’s up to somebody else."
Jay-Z to Kingsize magazine
Bitter?  You make the call...

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Omarion's Skinny Jeans Are In A Bunch

Omarion is pouting because he wasn't invited to take part in the Michael Jackson tribute at tonight's Grammy awards.  Uh, who is this kid again?
"If I'm not a part of that, then that's not... I'm not gonna say it's wack... But I'm just saying, everyone knows what I do, so if you gon' have an MJ tribute...I take that back because Stevie [Wonder] did an MJ tribute. Everyone loved Michael. I'm not gon' say that. I'm just meaning the performance [aspect]. How you gon' have a Michael tribute without the playboy? [Laughs]. That's my only thing, and I mean this in the humblest and the most competitive way. I'm competitive -- that's what the game is about. Especially after Mike passed away, I feel like the stage, it's more important now. It's a responsibility to me when I hit the stage to not play with it. If you walk back and forth that's cool, too. If that's how you entertain, that's cool, but for the performances and for the dances and for the people that look up to Michael in the fashion I look up to Michael? I hope they bring it. Because if they don't, then I will."
Crickets have quit chirping and left the fockin' building.


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What's Brewing?: Pre-Grammy Roundup

What's the point in posting everyone else's pics and pics we've got no plans to pay for? So here's a little pre-Grammy roundup fo' ya.

And by the way, catch our live-blog of the Grammy's tonight. We'll set it off at 8 pm (ET).  Come here to the Brew and check it out.

Here's What's Brewing...

Only Rihanna could pull off this Viktor & Rolf look - That Grape Juice

Thankfully, no one caught a beatdown this year after Clive Davis' Grammy party (well, for Kendu's sake, we hope that's the case) - Concrete Loop 

2010 Grammy predictions - Rap-up

Mah boo & Roberta Flack to duet @ the Grammys - 411mania

MJ's kids will honor the King of Pop @ the Grammys - CNN

Grammy fashion fails - PopEater

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Brew Bits: Miss America 2010

Congrats to Ms. America 2010. Caressa Cameron. The 22-year-old Fredricksburg, VA native took the title last night in Las Vegas. She beat out 52 other contestants for the 50,000 scholarship prize.


Saturday, January 30, 2010

Jaheim Cleans Up Nice

Jaheim has gone from this…

To this…

Just in time to drop a new album. His new project, “Another Round,” drops February 9th. Here’s his new song, “Finding My Way Back.”

Jaheim - Finding My Way Back .mp3
Found at bee mp3 search engine

I like the new song… but this is still my auntie Lisa Raye get down in the club jam!

So…you likey?

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David Paterson a.k.a. "Sticky Fingaz"

They say when you lose one sense the other senses become sharper. Clearly that's the case with New York Governor David Paterson. Word on the curb is that the legally blind leader got caught in the closet at the Governor's Mansion fine tuning his sense of touch with a friend. A trooper reportedly found the startled couple snuggling in a electricity room (*insert joke here*).  The trooper reported the incident to his supervisor. Subsequently, the state protocol for patrolling the Governor's mansion was changed. These newest allegations come on the heels of another claim that Paterson and a family "friend" were spotted nuzzling at a restaurant 10 weeks ago. You may recall, right after taking office Paterson admitted to cheating on his wife Michelle. His spokesperson has issued a "what had happened"...denying the incident ever took place. Damn D, just say you thought it was your wife!


Brew Bits: Jill Scott Talks Boobs, Bras & Lifetime Movies

Jill Scott is back! (And the church says...)

Jill popped over to the Chelsea Lately show to talk about her bra line with Ashley Stewart, her new son and her new Lifetime movie, "Sins of the Mother."  There's whole lotta "newness" going on with Miss Jilly, and I'm ready for it all.

"Sins of the Mother" airs on Lifetime, Sunday, February 21st at 8 pm (ET).  And, Jill's new album, The Light Of The Sun: Words and Sounds, Vol. 4, is due out in the Spring/Summer of this year.

And, while we're on the subject of Jill and all her newness... (geez, is this a publicity post?). Here's the full trailer for Jill's movie, "Why Did I Get Married, Too?" (due out April 2nd).  Cuz I don't feel like clicking and publishing a separate post for a Tyler Perry flick.  Lazy Saturdays at the Brew!

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"I Remember The Way He Used To Love Me...."

Look what the cat dragged out of former Premier of Turks and Caicos Michael Misick's U-Haul storage bin; 
he and LisaRaye's taped wedding invitation. Peep the candles, the Freddie Jackson hits, the roller set! 
This looks like an end of the year telethon by the the Rev and First Lady of All Falls Down Church of 
God in Christ. Cheesay party for one!

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Brew Music: Erykah Badu + Lil Wayne

Uh, er, ah... how's this for an odd couple: Erykah Badu and Lil Wayne?

Well, they got one thing in common... lots o'baby donors.  But, I digress.  Here's a new song from Silly E. Badu and Weezy called "Jump Up In The Air and Stay There" (damn, that's a long azz title).

Erykah Badu feat. Lil Wayne - Jump In The Air & Stay There (Rip) .mp3
Found at bee mp3 search engine

I stan for Badu so she can almost do no wrong in my book.  But, do you likey?

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Friday, January 29, 2010

One Super Bowl Ad You Won’t See

The prudes over at CBS won’t show you a new ad from the gay dating site ManCrunch. But we will.

CBS called the ad “entirely commercial in nature” (um, yeah, it’s a commercial), then rejected it because it's “not within the Network's Broadcast Standards for Super Bowl Sunday."  Whatever that means.

Anywho, the people at ManCrunch say if the ad showed a heterosexual kiss, it would have been accepted, no problemo.

So, what do you think? Should this ad get some Super Bowl airtime? You be the judge.

Now, drop a comment in the box.

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Brew Bits: Coco's Makeup Routine

From the They Shoulda Never Let You TwitPic files...

Ice-T's plastic bag, Coco (@cocosworld), tweeted this photo of herself getting ready for a movie premiere yesterday.  Is it really that hard to buy a chair?  Really?  And shouldn't she have like 50-11 yeast infections by now?

By the way, follow us on Twitter (@lawitchesbrew).  We don't tweet such nonsense.

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R. Kelly Wants Your Help

...speaking of Haiti.  R. Kelly is doing his part to help the people of Haiti.  But, there's something flat out creepy about this "PSA."

Maybe it's his appeal to help the kids... or is it the dogs?  Or maybe it's his confusion of a text number vs. a real phone number.  I dunno.  You watch.  You decide.

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Will You Watch?: BET's Haiti Concert

BET is getting in on the Haiti relief effort all late and whatnot.  The network plans to do a concert for Haiti next month, with Diddy, Queen Latifah and Pharrell on deck as hosts. 

The two hour concert/telethon, called "SOS Saving OurSelves — Help for Haiti," will be broadcast live from Miami and it'll mark Chris Brown's first "major" return to TV.

Wyclef Jean, Mary J. Blige, Drake, Robin Thicke, Monica and Lil Wayne are also scheduled to perform. Proceeds from the event will go to Yele Haiti, CARE and other charities.

"SOS Saving OurSelves — Help for Haiti" airs on BET, MTV, VH1 and Centric at 8 pm (ET) on February 5th.

So, will you watch?

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Birthday Brew: Happy Birthday Harpo!

A big happy b'day shout to Oprah Winfrey.  The Big O turns 56 today and I imagine she's off somewhere celebrating with her boo and and her beau (you decide who's who).

BTW... did you know her birth name was "Orpah" like the Biblical characterFast-Fact Fridays at the Brew!

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Valentine's Day Treat, From PETA

Even PETA gets down with the taco sometimes... this Valentine's Day, order up a special sumthin' sumthin' for your vegan honey.

This priceless thong can be yours for just 10 bucks.

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Membership Intake Never Looked So Good...

Guess it's SGRho's turn at the defendant's table. Pledges are getting snitchy, and Nationals are fed up!

Several Rutgers University students claim they endured beatings at the hands of their would-be big sisters while pledging a sorority. Now, six young women are under arrest, facing serious hazing charges. The police made arrests at a university dormitory both Tuesday and Wednesday. The charge is aggravated hazing, an illegal initiation ritual that in this case allegedly left one student's buttocks bruised and bleeding from a wooden paddle. Six members of Sigma Gamma Rho, an African-American sorority, are accused in the scandal.

Both the university and the sorority's national office issued stern "zero-tolerance" statements Wednesday night.

All six accused students are out on bail. They're suspended from school and their sorority is suspended pending the outcome of a series of investigations.

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Thursday, January 28, 2010

Sex Offender At The Super Bowl?

I haven't been keeping up with the foozball Super Bowl thingy.  Hell, I just learned what a "Who Dat?" was last week.  Anyway, the halftime entertainment at the Bowl will be The Who.  People who live around the stadium where the game will be played next month in Miami have received an advisory, indicating that a sex offender will be coming to town.  That offender is Pete Townshend of The Who.

Pete Townshend

Townshend is a registered sex offender thanks to an arrest seven years ago in the UK during a pedophilia sting.  While he wasn't convicted of the crime, he was placed on a sex offenders list for admitting he used a credit card to look at nasty kiddie pics online.

So lemme get this straight... folks get their knickers in a twist over a little flash of Janet Jackson boob, but a registered offender gets invited to the show?  Ummm, ok.

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Brew Music: Mariah + Nicki Minaj, Usher

Somewhere, a Barbie dollhouse sat empty while these two made a video.  Peep Mariah Carey's new video with Nicki Minaj, "Up Out My Face."  

Those two look like Mother-Daughter Barbies.  And, for the life of me, I still don't know what Nicki be taumbout.

Meanwhile, Usher is back and he's getting his Trey Songz Usher on.  Here's his new song, "Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home)."

You likey?

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Brew Funny: Presidential PSA

By now, we've all seen the rather awkward public service announcement featuring former presidents Bill Clinton and George W. Bush appealing to Americans to donate to the Haitian earthquake relief effort.  Well, Dutch comedian Joezjny did some crafty editing to create some "behind the scenes" footage of the PSA.  Watch as Clinton nails (no pun intended) his lines, and Bush struggles.


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Does Your Mother Love You This Much?

People are going nutso with the ink these days.  First, there was that fool who got Ray Bans tatted on his face.  Now, this mother gets a tattoo of a local DJ in Miami so her daughter can meet Justin Bieber. I mean, I could see if it was Maxwell or somebody with staying power...but this kid?

Would your mother go this hard for you?

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Edwards Scandal Gets Real Messy

The John Edwards I impregnated my mistress, denied the kid, lied to my cancer-stricken wife and lost my political career scandal is about to get realllllllll messy.  Edwards now admits he's the daddy (although he did that through a punk azz statement).  And, he and his wife, Elizabeth, are legally separated.

But, Word on the curb is there's a sex tape of the former senator and his side-piece, Rielle Hunter. A former aide claims he found the tape.  And it just so happens the aide, Andrew Young, has a new book detailing the affair.  Young says he found the tape of Hunter and Edwards in a pile of trash in a house where Hunter once lived. The tape reportedly shows Edwards with a pregnant woman (you can't see her face, but you know it's him) doing the nastay.

Mmm.  This is some freakiness.  If the Edwards sex tape emerges, will YOU watch it?

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The Grammys Won't Be Too "Hard"

Oh no! Should I stop breathing? Should I even bother waking up in the morning?

It's been announced that Rihanna will not be performing at the Grammy awards on Sunday night.  Rih told Carson Daly that she won't be hitting the stage because...
"We messed up the show pretty bad last year, so they’re probably a little mad at me right now.”
Um.  Who is we?  Seems to me that she was on the receiving end of that arse whuppin' at the teeth, forehead, fists hands of Chris Brown.  She needs to let that "we" shyt go and get up and yodel sing a damn song.  What will I do without my Jeezy fix?

By the way, we Brewchies are live-blogging the Grammys on Sunday night.  Join us at 8 pm (ET).

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Let's get one thing straight, off the bat. I STAN for Vanessa Williams. That's Mah Nessa, and don't nobody better say anything bad about her beautiful, talented, classy, freak mama ass! Now that I have gotten that off my chest. Mah Nessa is losing her job.

Yep, UGLY BETTY'S been cancelled. ABC after yanking the show around all season first Fridays, now Wednesday's after Cougar Town. (I mean who is watching TV on a Friday? Hopefully you are hanging with your homies or making sweet tender Pay Day Loan love!)

I'm pretty sure that the early season casting of that not- so- good- an actress Respeito loving Yaya DaCosta didn't help matters. And the fact that Betty is really cute these days, doesn't that defeat the purpose? I unno. I'm just going to blame this all on the smug pretty face of Yaya. And now that I think about it, Eva The Diva looks more like Mah Nessa that that tool bag, Yaya... what the junk?!

Not to be all ''Grassy Knoll" about this, but Ugly Betty is one of the most ethnically diverse shows on a major network today. Coincidence? Story

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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

The Benjamin Button Files: Greg Oden

No need to recap the drama surrounding Greg Oden's Peter Piper; he's got "ahem" bigger issues if he's still trying claim he's only 22. Go seek ye thee fountain of youth, stat!

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Shake It Fast...Watch Yo'self

You ever go out with your girls and there is that one chica who dances a little too hard and auntie-ish with her sessy mouth poked out? Peep exhibit #434: Lisa "First Lady of Atlanta" Raye. She's a little bit country and a little bit rock 'n roll...I guess?


Brew Music: Sade

Three new tracks from Sade leaked today.  Take a listen...

Sade “In Another Time”

Sade “The Moon and The Sky”

Sade “Skin”

Sade is giving me everything right now!  "Soldier of Love" drops next month, btw.


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Take Dat, Take Dat... PETA Case #988790238423

Folks ain't effin' with PETA and their peeps no more.  Used to be a time when those fur-huggers would say some grimey isht or toss red paint on ya and you'd run off in shame and be on the fashion shyt list for a minute, only to emerge with a fresh chinchilla in about a year.  And so went the vicious cycle.

Well, not any more.  Celebs are going innnn on PETA and clapping back. Case in point: the extra faaaaabulous figure skater Johnny Weir.  One of Johnny's costumes has some fox fur on the sleeve.  Several groups (including PETA) have asked Johnny to stop wearing the fur... some going so far as to send him videos of how animals are tortured for their fur.  Another group called, Friends of Animals, sent him and his costume designer an open letter about the fur.

That letter sent Johnny's index finger pointing and his neck rolling:
“I totally get the dirtiness of the fur industry and how terrible it is to animals. But it’s not something that’s the No. 1 priority in my life. There are humans dying everyday. There are thousands if not millions of homeless people in New York City. Look at what just happened in Haiti. I tend to focus my energy, if there is a cause, on humans. While that may be callous and bad of me, it’s my choice.  Every skater is wearing skates made out of cow.  Maybe I’m wearing a cute little fox while everyone else is wearing cow, but we’re all still wearing animals.”
Then Weir went off on the group because this is the first time anyone has tried to put the verbal smackdown on his designer:

“She did what I asked her to. It wasn’t her choice to make me a costume with fur.  At least directly come to me and yell at me. Don’t attack my peeps.”
His peeps?  Is he 'bout to call Pookie & 'em? 


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Idiots, Party of Two

The short bus and idiot's table just got one more rider:

You can add Javaris Crittenton to the "will dribble for food" line.  NBA commissioner David Stern suspended Washington Wizards guards Gilbert Arenas and Crittenton for the remainder of the season for having guns in the locker room.

Stern said guns will not be tolerated! And to top it off, both players were suspended without pay for their roles in bringing guns into the Wizards' locker room.

Arenas is in the 2nd season of a 6-year, $111 million contract.

Taste the Brew to read Stern's full statement on these two dumbasses.

Read more »

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Steve Jobs Just Made Me Mess M'self!

In the words of Lil' Jon 'AWW SKEET SKEET SKEET!' somebody pass me a wet nap!
The iPad resembles an iPhone, but larger. Apple will sell some iPad models with data plans from AT&T, with no contract required. CEO Steve Jobs says the iPad will be better for reading books, playing games and watching video than either a laptop or a smart phone. Story
Kindle sits in the corner and starts cutting itself.

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Cornball Corner: Paul Shirley

"When the grass is cut, the snakes will show"... So for this next story, let's say the grass is Haiti and the snakes, well, take your pick: Pat Robertson, Rush Lim-fat-baugh and now former NBA benchwarmer Paul Shirley. Shirley, whose brief (and I mean brief) NBA career (18 games and 33 points), is not feeling Haiti at all. He blogged on Flip Collective why he won't be pitching any of his pennies to help: "I haven't donated a cent to the Haitian relief effort. And I probably will not. I haven't donated to the Haitian relief effort for the same reason that I don't give money to homeless men on the street. Based on past experiences, I don't think the guy with the sign that reads "Need You're Help" is going to do anything constructive with the dollar I might give him. If I use history as my guide, I don't think the people of Haiti will do much with my money either.... Shouldn't much of the responsibility for the disaster lie with the victims of that disaster?"

(*crickets chirping*) But gets worse better. The former Iowa standout also wrote a ficticious letter to the earthquake victims:

Dear Haitians –

First of all, kudos on developing the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere. Your commitment to human rights, infrastructure, and birth control should be applauded.

As we prepare to assist you in this difficult time, a polite request: If it's possible, could you not re-build your island home in the image of its predecessor? Could you not resort to the creation of flimsy shanty- and shack-towns? And could some of you maybe use a condom once in a while?


The Rest of the World

(*Picks bottom lip off floor*) ESPN fired Shirley from his freelance gig. So I guess this solves Shirley's problem of whether to donate since he's pockets just took a bit fat hit!

Paul Shirley you are sitting in the Brew's Cornball Corner, permanently!

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Brew Bits: Is Pink Punking B?

I love Pink, quiet as kept. And this girl can blow; but she betta be careful fo Mr. Matthew comes for dat arse! Here she is singing her hit "Stupid Girls" and some claim she's taking pot shots Bey! Do you boo!

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